Wednesday, March 12, 2008

so i ran out of diet pills

ugh. i have way too much to do. i can't focus. i don't have enough time to devote to proper starvation. i don't work out enough but somehow, every day i hurt too much to want to go to the gym on non-training days. i'm not doing enough, and yet i'm overbooked.

i have a bunch of shows coming up in april. i have a fucking runway gig to walk for on april 5th. eek. my abs hurt when i cough. i'm worried that i'm going to be too fat for my most important upcoming gig.

the nicest guys always have some fatal flaw. like polyamory. i always have some fatal flaw. like a boyfriend that i just can't entirely give up on, even when something better is just staring me in the face. he makes sense. he doesn't punish girls for not being a consistent fuck puppet. agh. love is stupid. love... is... so... fucking... stupid. or maybe i'm just fat. who knows! whee!


featherlight said...

love the thinspo, love your struggles. i identify. what diet pills have you fund to be effective? i like getting cleanse and detox pills from health stores. they are gentle laxatives that help you drop a couple pounds.

Anonymous said...

love, love, love the thinspo. I just spent an hour looking at your old posts. Stay strong, try to be positive. -Lexi

Anonymous said...

This site is discusting.
You'r body is a temple and you should love it no matter how big or small it is!
you shouldn't starve yourself or live on diet pills or laxatives you should get up off of you're arses get a gym membership and train the fat off. that way you're staying healthly and building up muscle so if you ever get into any trouble you can handle yourself instead of getting every bone broken!
.sorry if iv offended you but this is sick.