not about food. guilt about my actions with others. guilt about who do i tell what about what i can only hope was really just a dream. oh man. does this have to be for real? because this is gonna be a bad scene somehow soon. or not. everything will be silent and happy like nothing happened, as long as informed parties remember to shut the fuck up. the case against that is guilt. then it's not even my guilt to worry about. that part scares me more than anything.
i can't work right now and i need to. i have shit due tomorrow and i don't think i can pull it all off tonight. i have to work so much harder, but my brain won't shut up about just how wrong this all is. ugh.
i'll have thinspo up sometime soon. i just want a stranger to spill every sordid detail to, just once. everyone who reads this blog is suspect to me, so don't go volunteering. hmm.
same old story
- so_alone
- me. i don't see me, but you do. i want to see me as you do, or as you say you do. you humor me when you say i'm tiny? are you laughing inside when you describe my pitted hulk as skeletal? i want to be happy with me. it's like someone pulled the gauze from my eyes and i see now, how imperfect, how weak, how ugly i am now, and just how perfect i really was when there was so much less of me. The less of me that you can see, the easier it is to love what's left of me. Honestly, I don't step on scales anymore. I can't. I'll go too far over the edge. I measure my world in sizes. I am currently a US size 6-8, UK 10. My ultimate goal size is a 4. I want my good jeans to fit. I want my thigh gap. And I want to be thin.
5 comments:
Obviously you wish not to reveal your secret, as you said all are suspect. However, whatever happened, don't let the guilt comsume you. No matter what it was, murder even, try to let it go and maybe no one will find out. There is nothing you can do to change what has been done, you just have to move forward. Good luck.
hey, great thinspo pics!!!!
lots of love from sweden!!!!
xoxoxoxoxo
you're all sick people looking like you're about to die of starvation isn't sexy! looking healthy is hot! anyone who agrees with this disgusting blog needs help immediatley. I suffered from this disease for a year and i realized that I never wanted to be scary skinny, the disease did. i'm sure you're all beautiful and special girls, but weighing 70 lbs. doesn't determine who you are and how people percieve you. You'll realize one day there's more to life than weight, and if you don't you might die. It's hell going through this, i know, so get out, because anorexia isn't fun
Hey, what happen with you?
Excuse my english, I try to do my best, I am so far away from you...
I come to this blog every day to know about you and I am worry because you did not post since a lot of time, I know I am not your friend but I would like to Know about people who think like me.
I love yours thinspo.
And please, again, excuse my english.
Juliet
ohhhh that is really really good thinspo and your blog is cute. maybe some day you can post in my blog kisses.
Post a Comment