freedom... tastes like fizzy water

So.. we are back after what feels like forever. The boy ended up moving in for a while after a job snafu left him kinda stranded. Before that, one of my trainers told me I wasn't allowed to restrict for the last two weeks of this piece I was making with him. I have no idea what I weigh and I'm not even going to look until I've done this week of restriction and then the GM diet the week after.

I had a two week break from school in the midst the boy being here (so i have to try to eat like a normal person), so I was eating tons of awful bread and cheese all the while being on mandatory rest. A whole six days of mandatory rest. Well, one of those days involved a 7.5 hour hike through the hills, but still, there was food involved in that too. I had meant to get back to training for at least 5 of my remaining days, but that fell flat when I caught a lingeringly evil cold.

The boy is away at work for the next month and half. I have all that time to get back to where I was, which was getting so good. The heartbreak of being without my lover will also probably be useful in keeping the eating thing to a minimum. My calorie counting is going to lose track on thursday when I'm off a camping trip, but I'll just replace food with booze for that and it will balance out anyway. Then I come back to the GM diet anyway.

It's funny, or sad... really; once his hand left mine, Ana stepped right in a put her arm around me. She whispered in my ear "Are you sure want to eat today?" And as usual, I'm never sure.

I have to eat enough to get this last project done, to keep my energy up for the hardest work I've ever done. But when I present this final piece, I will be goddamn thin. 115lbs if I can hack it.

Stay strong and think thin my lovelies. 50 squats, 60 situps, and 100 jacks.... GO!