i never meant to leave you for so long

the last semester of college is really hard and it eats all of my time. i barely have time to eat, but for some godforsaken reason i still do it. i'm currently sick so i can't start restricting severely again. but i am going to start carrying a camelback again so i drink enough water. i start drinking water and i immediately lose weight. once i'm better, i'm going on a negative calories fast (i.e. lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber, celery, etc; foods that take more calories to digest than they actually have). i'll do that for about a week and see how it works. i never have time to work out anymore. i'm broke so dance classes are all but out of my reach. winter is moving in so biking places requires much more motivation than i have at the moment.

i'm sorry i left you all for so long. i've been posting most of your comments (not the really mean or ignorant ones). updates in the world of so_alone:
new boything, really nice, totally not involved in my scene... yay!
progess, sort of, with a different boything down the coast... phew!
my ex is such a dick. as usual. it sucks that i have to see him at conventions, and that a good chunk of my long distance friends share a business and a housing situation. fucking douchey people... so lame.
europe was crazy drama that tried to break my fat little heart. no such luck.
i'm still fat, but no one believes me when i say it. but i'm really gross right now. my thighs still touch. sure i'm stronger, but i want to be thinner.

stay strong loves, think thin. ana loves you as long as you obey her.