breakfast:
lettuce and sprouts in a low carb tortilla
salsa, 1/2tbsp sourcream
1?4C tortilla chips
1 nectarine
i'm going to the gym soon. after that, i'm practicing for a while. and after that, i'm going to the grocery store for a toothbrush and a pregnancy test. i've been too hungry lately and i'm getting suspicious. if i am pregnant, that will make for a few weeks of doctors and then... probably a trip to planned parenthood. a one-way trip... at least for one of us. i'm probably just bloated though from skipping my period with birthcontrol and eating too much in general. i'm supposed to be going out tonight. so we'll see how well my will holds up.
think thin girls! i have loads of thinspo to put up later.
same old story
- so_alone
- me. i don't see me, but you do. i want to see me as you do, or as you say you do. you humor me when you say i'm tiny? are you laughing inside when you describe my pitted hulk as skeletal? i want to be happy with me. it's like someone pulled the gauze from my eyes and i see now, how imperfect, how weak, how ugly i am now, and just how perfect i really was when there was so much less of me. The less of me that you can see, the easier it is to love what's left of me. Honestly, I don't step on scales anymore. I can't. I'll go too far over the edge. I measure my world in sizes. I am currently a US size 6-8, UK 10. My ultimate goal size is a 4. I want my good jeans to fit. I want my thigh gap. And I want to be thin.
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