Thursday, March 29, 2007

delta zero; still sick, still fat

the food photos are just so ironic. it makes me happy... more motivated i guess. i can do that. there has been much less of me before. 29 days. i can do this.

122.4 again. i hate the logic of being sick. i hate knowing how to be healthy. eating has become a reflex to nausea and illness. that needs to go away again. i'm too sick to excercise. maybe if i wake up in time tomorrow, i can just make a litre of hot lemonade and see how long i can last on that with diet coke and cigarettes as crutches.

tomorrow at least brings fewer excuses for food. maybe i'll just drink juice all day. i don't need to be strong to go shopping. same for friday. i have 29 days to hit 115 or lower. i just need the free time to be able to do minimal thinking and daily gut cleansing. until then however, i have to work harder. eat less. drink more water. i'm not at 2-3L per day like i should be. i'll definitely work on that tomorrow.

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