so today is day two of taking NV and so far, it has offered amazing punishment to my guts. it's nice. actually today.
today's food might sound like a lot, but i did a whole fuckload of work today too.
breakfast: 1 half vegan bagel
later: 1C thai noodle soup (vegan), .5 biscuit
later: 1 C salad, 3 cubes tofu, 6 slices cucumber, 1 tbsp ranch, sweet chile sauce and tapatillo (mostly neg. cals)
later: 1 cookie
later: 1C vegan cabbage-slaw, 1 piece tofish (vegan)
later: 5 cheese/broccoli veggie bites
excercise:
bike to school (light books)
walk around campus all day ( 4hours just walking from place to place)
5-7pm at gym, some dancing, 1hr 5min running, 20 min abs/arms
bike home (heavy books)
sorry loves, no time for thinspo photos tonight. just my reverse-trigger of a blog. must be up and active in less than six hours.
same old story
- so_alone
- me. i don't see me, but you do. i want to see me as you do, or as you say you do. you humor me when you say i'm tiny? are you laughing inside when you describe my pitted hulk as skeletal? i want to be happy with me. it's like someone pulled the gauze from my eyes and i see now, how imperfect, how weak, how ugly i am now, and just how perfect i really was when there was so much less of me. The less of me that you can see, the easier it is to love what's left of me. Honestly, I don't step on scales anymore. I can't. I'll go too far over the edge. I measure my world in sizes. I am currently a US size 6-8, UK 10. My ultimate goal size is a 4. I want my good jeans to fit. I want my thigh gap. And I want to be thin.
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